1.7.10

Whatever Let's You Sleep

There's is a thing I have learned about my mother, a thing that drives me insane, that makes me hate myself and makes me hate her even more. When she's gotten on her high horse, when she is just absolutely certain that she's right and everyone else is wrong, it's best not to argue or show any kind of emotion that might make her think you're arguing with her. It's pointless because the minute you try to disprove her, to point out the blindingly obvious flaws in her argument, she starts yelling even louder than before (and this is a woman who's inside voice is the same as most people's outside voice) and it will just make what is already a painful experience that much worse. Sure, I lie awake in bed not able to get to sleep because I want so badly to argue my point, or at least get the opportunity to argue my point. And yes, this aggravating habit makes me want to run away and never come back and never talk to her ever again. But this is how she has been my entire life. She won't change and I argued most of my childhood and it got me absolutely nowhere. I just have to get this final thing off my chest though: There is a difference between turning on a personal computer without any kind of permission and turning on a computer widely available to the entire family having been given blanket permission to use it. It's a huge difference and cannot be ignored because of the location of said personal computer. So fuck you bitch, it's my goddamn computer and I expect to be treated with respect. So leave my fucking computer alone and don't fucking turn it on without my goddamn permission. Just fucking call me and I'll say yes.
This, along with a number of other things, is why I want to go to law school out of state, even if that means living the rest of my life in debt. I can't live here for another three fucking years.

1 comment:

Kirkland Ciccone said...

Dear Nore,

you cannot reason with the unreasonable! You must learn from Donna Noble and her mother Sylvia. Sylvia was forever shouting at her daughter...of course Donna saved the whole of the universe!

K!