Goodbye

Ten-Inch is leaving the building. Technically he hasn't left the show yet, but he's still left it in spirit. He says he doesn't want to out stay his welcome, but look at Tom Baker: He was on the show for seven fucking years. Being on it for only 4 years really isn't that long. I mean generally speaking. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DON'T LEAVE US DAVID!!!!!!!
In other news, I'll be writing up a review of the new Kaiser Chiefs album this weekend. Look forward to a lot of bashing.

If Only

If I could get everything floating around in my head off my chest, if we could just talk about my issues for a little bit, so he could understand what's going on in my head, I think things would be better if not necessarily easier. There would still be some things in the way, but it would be better. If there was a guide or a template I could work from an example of how this is suppose to work I would feel more comfortable knowing that this is how it's suppose to work. If I could trust myself and my own judgement and if he weren't so damn horny I wouldn't be so confused and unsure of everything. If he had listened when I said I wanted to take things slow and I hadn't allowed my pent up sexual energy run the show we wouldn't be here and I wouldn't be so frustrated with myself. If I lived under a rock things would be so much easier. I try to go along with things and not let my paranoia and psychosis get in the way, but when all is said and done they're still there haunting me and calling into question every aspect of this relationship. I want Prince Charming and have decided that settling for a person is just fine and I can be happy with that, but then the memories of fifth grade and Miles come back and make me wonder how long this will all last. If he hadn't happened, if I didn't hold onto that experience like a safety blanket or protective shield, I wouldn't be calling into question every move we make and every little thing we do. It was all so much easier when I could believe that romance worked in the real world the same way it does in musicals and books. I wish I had someone neutral to talk to about all of this, just so I could know I'm not losing my mind. I wish Farber was here. He always seems to know what to do, even if I don't usually follow his advice.
I don't want to take back what's happened. I just wish I knew where this was all headed towards.

This Week...

- My hall finally passed the middle of the night fire drill (only took us like five times, but we passed!)
- Shocked Allison into talking to me
- Established that I am actually in a relationship
- Got really fancy shampoo
- Have re-established (multiple times) that I'm a paranoid nutter with body issues
- Decided that I will secretly and deceptively brain-wash Hunter
- "Watched" Spaced with someone outside my family (some watching was done, just not a whole lot, but I'm counting it anyway because I don't think I'll ever get Clark to watch it [sadly, cuz he'd really like it])
- Didn't completely fail my skills mid-term
And Finally...
- Got Young Frankenstein, Hogfather (go Terry Pratchett and Elton!), and The Nightmare Before Christmas

Once a Cold, Always a Cold

I'm just going to start off by saying NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The reason I'm saying this is because Once was not meant to be made into a Broadway fucking musical. It is perfect in its movie form and why are the trying to ruin my favourite movie???
I've got a cold at the moment and have decided that I'm in conversation, no matter how hard I try. There are fences that have yet to come down and I'm dating a person with the exact same disability I have. But the cold is getting better.

Anglo-Audiophile, Paranoid Nutter

I feel I should post something, but what I want to write about is a bit to personal and hasn't been fully worked in my head, so instead I'll post a random Friday Five. It has to do with death 0_0

1. If you were to die today, what would your last words be?
Don't panic

2. What would you want your epitaph to say?
Anglophile, Audiophile, Paranoid Nutter

3. What song would you want played at your funeral?
"All These Things That I Have Done" by the Killers and "Days" by the Kinks

4. In lieu of flowers, what should loved ones do in your honor?
Listen to Kaiser Chiefs, the Kinks, and the Cribs a whole damn lot

5. What unfinished business would you wrap up
Visit London one last time

V. Random

Just to amuse: The 20 Most Awesome SciFi TV Theme Songs
Yeah, I'm a little bored right now. Enjoy.

Easy Observation

I'm of the opinion that it's much easier to hide under a rock than to open oneself up to the possibility of being hurt. I'm shy and quite by nature and tend to spend a lot of time by myself. I've developed a rather eccentric personality and a broad (as in from abroad) range of interests that set me apart from most of my peers. And now for the first time in my life someone is trying to penetrate my fortress. It's a bit scary I'll admit, but all my fears and worries seem to all but dissipate when I'm in his arms. Just being there is the best feeling I've ever known. I tend to forget everything else and just concentrate on his breathing. It's nice, very nice indeed.

Oh What A Night

Remember in my last entry how I joked about my big news being that I had finally gotten a boyfriend? Ya know, the funny bit right before I said that Franz Ferdinand had announced a release date for their third album? Yeah, think back. (This is my way of saying I think* I really, honestly do have a boyfriend. No shit.)
I've got one very persistent song running through my head which has now been given a partner ("Then He Kissed Me" and "December 1963"). My limbs haven't fully recovered which seems a bit odd but overwhelming joy can do that I guess. This is all very strange and very foreign and amazingly wonderful at the same time. Thank god I had never seen The Blues Brothers before. That's about all I can say right now.
One last thing: I found my Doctor :biggest grin known to man:
*The word use of "think" comes from a distinct lack of knowledge on how this whole thing works. In a sad bit of pathetic-ness, I'm waiting for him to change his status on Facebook.

Not So Bitchy Update

So last night was a bit bitchy which I will blame on my canker-sore. However, this morning provided some happy news so I have decided to update with said happy news. What is my happy news? I have a boyfriend! No, just kidding, that's not it all. No, Franz Ferdinand have announced a release date for their third album! And a track listing! Not that it really matters since the only song I've heard from their new batch of songs is "Lucid Dreams" but still yay! That means I have two more exciting releases before the end of the year (Kaiser Chiefs and Killers*) and then one really exciting release at the beginning of the year. (Lily Allen has announced a release date but it's only for those countries that release CDs on Monday and therefore does not apply to US) Also, Pitchfork is coming out with a book in November. I don't actually care about that fact, but found it interesting nonetheless.
*The Killers have turned into a nonsensical techno band which makes the raver that lives in the joy center of my brain very happy. Their new single "Human" is ridiculously giddy and wonderful. Here's part of the chorus, as an example: "Are we human/Or are we Dancer/My signs are vital/My hands are cold/And I'm on my knees looking for the answer/Are we human or are we dancer?" It makes me happy on the inside just thinking about it.
Ta for now.

Bitchy Update

I was so stressed out by my mid-terms that I got a canker-sore at the back of my jaw. You have to admit, that's pretty fucking stressed out. Granted it's a pain in the ass given where it is because the damn think makes it really painful to open my mouth all the way which makes yawning really painful and hard to do. Anyway, I've got classes tomorrow which I'm not particularly looking forward to no real reason other than that I don't feel like getting up before 9am. Also I'm currently trying to wrap my head around playing music that I don't have memorized because real hipster listen to cool hipster music. However depending on how my Thursday goes I may not want to be a real hipster, so we'll see. God I just want this week to be over. And for it to be really truly fall instead of this endless Indian summer.

Pop Shouldn't Be a Dirty Word

We're studying secondary dominants in theory right now and Prof. Long has been making a lot quippy remarks about pop music. Today however was the cherry on the sundae. I feel I should mention that Prof. Long is a composer and holds a fancy doctorate in something pertaining to music (I don't remember whether it's theory or composition.) To Prof. Long pop starts are illiterate idiots who degrade the artistry of music. I sighed heavily and closed my eyes every time he mentioned pop today, mainly because I was thinking of skipping today's class and was wishing I had. You see I wish I could immerse myself in pop at all times and really want to spend the rest of my life listnening and studying pop music. Yes the people who perform pop music can be considered the equivalent of trained monkeys (I'm thinking of Britney Spears and her ilk when I say this) but the people who write pop songs are every bit as sophisticated as classical composers. A person can't write a good pop song without knowing what they're doing. Singer-songwriters may not get a formal education in theory (most of the time anyway) but they know what they're doing. They have to. You can write mediocre crap and get no where very quickly in the music business. It takes skill and a thorough understanding of pop music to really get anywhere in the business (at least the mainstream business.) Writing off pop music as the domain of idiots is like accusing Judy Bloom of not being a good writer. Pop shouldn't be a dirty word in the world of music.

Lyrics pt. 4,252

In a vain effort to avoid writing my sociology paper (minimum wage sucks ass and here's why the politicians won't do jack about) here are some lyrics. I've included a small explanation for why I chose each song because I really don't want to write this paper. Cheers!

Autumn Almanac --- The Kinks [It's officially autumn, the song's called autumn almanac, it's by the Kinks, therefore it's perfect]

From the dew-soaked hedge creeps a crawly caterpillar,
When the dawn begins to crack.
It's all part of my autumn almanac.
Breeze blows leaves of a musty-coloured yellow,
So I sweep them in my sack.
Yes, yes, yes, it's my autumn almanac.

Friday evenings, people get together,
Hiding from the weather.
Tea and toasted, buttered currant buns
Can't compensate for lack of sun,
Because the summer's all gone.

La-la-la-la...
Oh, my poor rheumatic back
Yes, yes, yes, it's my autumn almanac.
La-la-la-la...
Oh, my autumn almanac
Yes, yes, yes, it's my autumn almanac.

I like my football on a Saturday,
Roast beef on Sundays, all right.
I go to Blackpool for my holidays,
Sit in the open sunlight.

This is my street, and I'm never gonna to leave it,
And I'm always gonna to stay here
If I live to be ninety-nine,
'Cause all the people I meet
Seem to come from my street
And I can't get away,
Because it's calling me, (come on home)
Hear it calling me, (come on home)

La-la-la-la...
Oh, my autumn Armagnac
Yes, yes, yes, it's my autumn almanac.
La-la-la-la...
Oh, my autumn almanac
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

Bop-bop-bopm-bop-bop, whoa!
Bop-bop-bopm-bop-bop, whoa!

You Don't Know Me --- Ben Folds ft. Regina Spektor [I've been wanting to post the lyrics to this song for various reasons for quite awhile now and I though it complimented the Kinks' general aesthetic]

I wanna ask you;
Do you ever sit and wonder
It's so strange that we could be together
for so long and never know, never care
what goes on in the other one's head?
Things I thought but I never said
You said things that I never said
So I'll say something that I should have said long ago

(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all
(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all
(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all
(You don't know me)

You could have just propped me up at the table like a mannequin
or a cardboard standup
and given me any face that you wanted me to be seen
we're damned by the existential moment
when we saw the couple in a coma
and it was weakened with the cliché
but we carried on anyway

So, sure, I could just close my eyes
Yeah, sure, trace and memorize
But can you go back once you know?

(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all

If I'm the person who you say i am
Clueless chump you seem to think i am
So he's been led astray like an errant dog
who occasionally escapes and needs a shorter leash than I thought
Would you want me back?
Maybe it's because...
You don't know me at all

(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all

So what I'm trying to say is
What I'm trying to tell you is
Not gonna come out like I wanna say it
'Cause i know you'll only change it (change it, change it)

(You don't know me)
You don't know me at all

Neeth the Beeches --- The Frames [There's something distinctly autumnal about Ireland and the Irish in general {maybe it's the red hair} so I picked a Frames song that seemed autumnal]

Hand me down the picture
Of you leaving unsaid
I know how simple it get
But sat by chance I need you
Will you always be there
And I will lie with you neath the beeches
On the strand again
I'm learning to hand it over
To whatever Lord there be
And in the same old colours
I'll be dressed for thee
But it's not about that though is it?
It's about you and me
I hung your feet
That famous painting above my bed
And you told me a story
About some guy who kept his head
He drowned neath the Southport
Near the pier where we stand

And I will lie with you neath the beeches
On the strand again

1234 --- Feist [I freakin' love this song and I thought it would make for a nice conclusion]

One, two, three, four
Tell me that you love me more
Sleepless long nights
That is what my youth was for

Old teenage hopes are alive at your door
Left you with nothing but they want some more

Oh, you're changing your heart
Oh, You know who you are

Sweetheart bitterheart now I can't tell you apart
Cosy and cold, put the horse before the cart

Those teenage hopes who have tears in their eyes
Too scared to own up to one little lie

Oh, you're changing your heart
Oh, you know who you are

One, two, three, four, five, six, nine, or ten
Money can't buy you back the love that you had then
One, two, three, four, five, six, nine, or ten
Money can't buy you back the love that you had then

Oh, you're changing your heart
Oh, you know who you are
Oh, you're changing your heart
Oh, you know who you are
Oh, who you are

For the teenage boys
They're breaking your heart
For the teenage boys
They're breaking your heart

Oh God Midterms

I don't have enough energy to write a proper entry, so I'm just going to say that I have mid-terms this week. Not that I expect that to change the way I update, but if I sound particularly frazzled, it's due to mid-term stress.
So I spent about three hours of my day hanging out in the amphitheatre, which was oddly invigorating. The place incredibly run down and because of the renovation that's taking place (and the fact that it's incredibly run down) no one really spends a lot of time in the amphitheatre, which makes it the perfect place for me to read and act like a goon. Granted every time I go there I get eaten alive by mosquitoes and today I had to contend with randomly falling acorns, but it was fun nonetheless. I even did a little singing which was quite risky since I'm sure my voice carries. However there were few interruptions, just a lot of acorns and bugs.
That's it. Ta for now.

One Liners (And Then Some)

- I'm not talented, stop acting/treating me like I am. >_<
- Damn Prof. Long is pissed at my theory class. He sent us two emails today and yeah, totally pissed.
- Vowels are evil and their phonetic representations are evil.
- Never Mind the Buzzcocks' new series premiers tomorrow night!!
- Stephen Fry is going to be a filler-in team captain on NMTB next week, which is even more exciting than the premier.
- My radio show is now Thursdays from 9 to 10pm.
- No House or Gossip Girl for two weeks. Which means I'm going to have to "secretly" watch them by myself when I'm home for fall break.
- One week till Keane (yay!), which means two weeks till KC (grr).

Okay, that's all the news from my world. I've got a rehearsal for this quartet that I've been asked to play in which will be performing tomorrow. I'm not entirely sure why I was asked to play in this quartet given the fact that I suck at sight reading for the most part and become a nervous wreck when playing in front of people, but I suspect it's because they couldn't find anyone else. And yes, I do realize that I'm being incredibly self-deprecating, but that's what happens when you have self-esteem the size of an ant. And no, don't try to pump me up because I won't believe you. Anywho I've got a linguistics mid-term on Friday as well as severe tongue-lashing from Prof. Long over the fact that the majority of our class sucks at life. Or, you could say that Prof. Long has expectations that aren't realistic because the three most vocal members of our class play a)more than one instrument and b)all play guitar. Because guitarists are freaks of nature, while the rest of the class are singers. And singers are idiots (at least when it comes to chords and music theory in general.) The rest of us just have to endure being stuck between idiots and guitarists. :shakes head: It's all so pathetically sad.